It Is What It Is

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It has been a rough three weeks for our affair, as if the heavens were set upon us not seeing each other.  Amber and I were to have a weekend together for the first time. But an unfortunate accident put an end to that plan. Then illness in the family ceased all but text messages for almost a week. Next a business trip and finally, more family illness kept us apart most of the past three weeks. If it had not been for text messages, we would have been islands.

After all of that, we got a “clearing in the weather” and had a chance to spend today together.
We enjoyed some time around lunch, with a little of a make out session followed by a snuggle session. Then this evening: dinner, kissing, petting, incredible sex and some more kissing.

I mention this for one reason. When you are involved in an affair, you have to be flexible. Always know that you are second to the life your partner has. They have family to protect and careers to pay attention to. While you may be important to the happiness of that other person, do not forget that you are the gravy in the meal. The meat and potatoes are the family and career.  Be patient and understanding. Eventually, your turn will come. And it will be worth the wait.

Please do not put a burden upon your affair partner. If you do so, you will be lowering yourself to tier of the person that they are cheating on. You are to be the person that understands above all else. You are to be the shoulder to cry on. You are to be the ear for a tearful cry after spouse has left for work. Your role is to be friend first, lover second. And never ever drive a wedge into the dynamics of your lover’s relationship. Listen and offer your advice if asked for. But do not undermine your lover’s marriage.

Stay loose, and stay available. It will be worth the efforts in the end, I promise.

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Let Me Give You a Hand

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Amber wrote recently about embracing the blowjob (fellatio). That got me to thinking about the most overlooked sexual experience, the hand job. You may be thinking, hell a hand job is just masturbating with someone else’s hand. Well, maybe so. But when applied correctly, the hand job is a long drawn out tease that will leave him with a teeth quaking climax.

Like women, each man has a combination of pressure, speed, and rhythm that affords a climax. As a woman, if you can master the hand job, you will know his every response to each of the variables and or combinations of variables.  Okay, you caught me, yes I am an engineer.

And ladies, once you master this, you can prolong his climax as long as you want. Imagine him clutching the sheets begging you to let him cum. That opposed to grabbing the back of your head and forcing your throat down on to his shaft. Pretty cool huh?

Consider this if you will. Once you know how a fingertip brushed just under the head of his cock stimulates him, you can apply that same touch with your tongue. When you know what rhythm gets him off, you can play that during fellatio or intercourse to delay climax or to get him there when you want him to be there.

I will promise you this. If you extend his pleasure by just 5 minutes, you will have him asking for more. If you give him a teeth aching toe curling experience, you will become the most talented lover he has ever had. And you can learn how to do this with the simple hand job.

Here are two links that a Google search turned up. There is even a YouTube video (Of Course) on giving a hand job.

I urge you to go forth and wank!

http://ideas.thenest.com/love-and-sex-advice/sex-questions-advice/articles/how-to-give-an-earth-shattering-hand-job.aspx

http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/hand-job

You Don’t Know What You Don’t Know

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I have lived the expression “You don’t know what you don’t know until you know it”, during my rehabilitation from a brain injury. But I have never felt I could apply that to my sexual experiences.

I have pretty much always been in the driver’s seat. Not to say that Amber has been in control of the sex. But I do have to share this one item that I feel blessed to be experiencing with her.

Never have I ever made love to (or had sex with) a woman that connects so intimately as Amber does.
I will try to describe what I am sensing in hopes that I can paint the mental picture for you. Warning: if you are pleased with your current sexual experiences. Skip this particular post.

Amber connects with me on a level I have never experienced before. She is constantly in contact with my body. She makes visual connection. She communicates her desires and her willingness while we are engaged in sex.

At the risk of becoming R rated, here is a description of a play date with Amber. If Amber wants a kiss, she will place her hand at the base of your skull and guide me in to her eager lips. When Amber is on top of me (riding Cowgirl), she will look me in the eye and share a “thank you” look before losing herself in orgasmic bliss. If she is on her back, her hands are always on me, finger nails on my chest, hands around my neck as she thrusts back against me. And again the look of “I want you” as her breathing becomes slow and deep. Then eyes rolled back as I feel her cum. Frankly, Amber is the most sensual woman I have had the pleasure of sharing intercourse with. I am such a fortunate man.

What I feel I want you to take from this blog post is for you to make the effort to connect with your partner while you are coupled. Don’t stop the seduction once foreplay is over.  Be all in and keep your lover in your focus. You will both benefit.

If you give this a try, and find it useful, please do share your experience. We would love to hear from you.

The Nightmare Blowjob and a Surprise…

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Brian had given me an amazing first oral sex experience.  Yes, as hard as it is to believe, before him, I had only had sex with just two people. Neither of whom had given me oral, so yes, it was the first time, and from the looks of it, it was also the first time, I ever had an orgasm.  (I agree with you, that is one really sad sex life for a 20 something)

As a girl, I always thought that a “Lady” never gave blowjobs, so I thought I wasn’t being lady like when I gave one. before Brian, I had only given three, or four, and I felt bad about it, but the truth is I liked it… sort of… it’s just I hadn’t given enough to say whether or not I liked it. 

Brian had given me an awesome experience and I thought I should return the favor, I googled, did my homework on fellatio, I was sure I was ready to give this man the dick suck of his life!!!! Well… turns out this is an acquired skill that requires practice

…lots of it!…

I was surprised at how much I actually liked it!!! I mean I really did, enjoy it! I was aroused, felt sensual, it was a totally new feeling for me!

I don’t know how many women think like I used to, but girls, y’all are missing out!!! Fellatio is fun!. Guys love it and in my case, it makes me feel sexy, and playful.

I’m sure some of you gals, think it’s gross, but the way I see it, I love kissing Brian, I kiss his forehead, his lips, I enjoy licking his earlobe and neck,  for me biting his lower lip is just a huge turn on!, why not kiss and lick, and taste that part of him that brings me so much pleasure; But after trying and doing, and learning(still learning) I can tell you, I like oral, I like to give him something he likes. 

I think great sex is about giving, not so much about receiving.

Girls, get down!!, and playful…and naughty!!! (not the same as dirty).  If you think your men have given you half as much pleasure as Brian has given me, then by all means they deserve it!!!. It may not be the best, but he will guide you towards what he likes.
Try it, always remember that this is for him. Don’t expect anything!

Here are 3 basics for Brian’s Blow jobs(if you ever find yourself with his cock in your mouth)

1. VISUAL: your pretty little lips and tongue all over the tip for an unforgettable show.
2. MOISTURE: Don’t suck it dry, lick it here and there, provides a show and moisture 😉
3. PAY ATTENTION: Pressure not to much, make sure your lips hold on his little friend is tight just so. Pay attention to his breathing, his caresses, and his moaning, that’ll give you the speed, depth and pressure he likes

Deep throating & Swallowing: You don’t have to, but give it a go! He’ll appreciate it. Get to know his little guy, you know he likes you, who knows, you might like him too.

First Meet Mr. B’s story

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I remember that first meeting very well.
Actually it came a day earlier than planned. We had been talking on the phone and somehow the conversation turned toward “Scratch and Sniff”, then to sniffing her panties. We hatched a plan where I would buy her Victoria’s Secret panties, she would model them for me and leave them with me to sniff later.

I am not into sniffing women’s panties, but it was a good ploy to see her naked. I really had no plans to bed her that evening. I still had not met her. She was great on the phone and in text, but still.

So the plan was to meet the next evening and go to Victoria’s Secret and buy panties. Then come back to my studio where she would model them. We first met at a deli I had never been to before. I arrived first and was waiting for her. The woman that walked through the door was so much more than I had expected. She was pretty, petite, confident and friendly. I had to wonder, why is she looking for men on Craig’s List.

She ate a very little bit of the salad she ordered. The conversation was quick and it was obvious she was nervous. I asked the usually questions when meeting a married woman. “What does hubby think you are doing?” “ What if someone you know sees us together?” I was satisfied with the answers, so off to Victoria’s Secret we went. That part seemed more awkward for me than for her. But we made it through well enough. And back to my place we went.

We sat on the sofa and talked some. Amber was very much a chatter box that night.  Nerves I suppose. We started to kiss. Oh wow, I loved the way she kissed. Almost hesitant with just enough “come get it” to make a man want more.  I put my hand at the base of her neck to draw her in for another kiss and she just melted. Her eyes closed, she went silent and suddenly she was all mine. Just from a hand on the base of her neck. I felt powerful and in control.

We made out on the sofa for a good while. I was so liking her. Her skin was soft, her hair silky, her kisses erotic and intoxicating. She responded to my every touch like I was a maestro on a fine violin. Oh, how I wanted this woman. “Hey, I want to see what we bought.” I had to see her body.

We sorted  through the purchases and decided on a bra and pantie pair in dark blue. She retreated to the bedroom to change. I felt like I was back in High School. Man I wanted to see this woman in her lingerie.

When she emerged from the bedroom, I saw much more cleavage than I thought I would see on such a petite woman. Her hips were so slim and her legs skinny but defined. She does a model spin and I see a tiny butt that looks like it belongs on a 14 year old boy, What shocked me was a mommy tummy. Normally, this would be a deal breaker for me. Yet, I am so impressed; I am willing to overlook this. Yes, very shallow of me I know. So sue me.

We kiss and make out some more. Her breasts are lovely. They are natural, heavy and full with large dark nipples that beg to be sucked. So I do.

We never discussed having intercourse on this first date. I don’t think either of us thought it would go that far. But I want this woman. And she seems pretty willing to go to the next level.  I lead her back in to the bedroom and I lay her down on the mattress. I remove her dark blue thong panties. I kneel next to the bed and spread her legs.
Slowly I lick her pussy. Tongue flat, not probing, just teasing. Her response is a soft whimper and I see her bite her lower lip.
Her pussy has more hair than I like, but not too much. I separate her outer lips to give me access to her clit. At this point I switch to “auto pilot”. My actions are driven by her reactions. My years of experience have taught me that women like different things. And the same woman likes different things at different times. Pay attention boys (and girls), the more aroused, the woman the more aggressive the play. A hard bit too early is a mood killer. That same bite when she is about to orgasm is the cherry on top the sundae. Oh and don’t neglect the nipples and the face. Put your hands to work.

After giving Amber a pretty respectable oral session, I wanted to penetrate her. I lost my pants and shirt. Climbed on the bed and got on top of her. I kissed her passionately. She seemed not to mind the taste of her own juices on my mouth. Good point to remember. While on top of her, I hooked my ankles inside her calves and forced her legs apart. She let out a whimper again. She likes being dominated. I like that she likes being dominated. My cock finds her opening. But in spite of the orgasms she has had, her pussy is too tight to get in. I dry hump her clit for a bit. Then I move up and feed her face my cock. She is not the oral expert I would have hoped for. But I am pleased over all. My erection fades without me having a climax. But surprisingly, I feel satisfied in the experience. I am excited my Amber.

We lay on the bed cuddling. I am mentally assessing the night’s events. It is clear that she only thought that she was experienced. In my mind, she is a blank canvas and I tell her so. I want to create a Brian original masterpiece on her canvas. I share my thought while promising that I will never do anything to hurt her. I need her trust on this journey of discovery. There is so much I want to share.